12 Lessons in 12 Weeks – Summer 2018

There was a period of time in our life where we openly shared all the ins and outs of our family’s life.  All the fun stuff like the 7 weeks we spent biking over 1,000 miles through British Columbia and the San Juan Islands,  or the backpacking trip with 4 year old Jill or the crazy trip when we drove hours out of our way from Colorado to go to Chaco Canyon in New Mexico (The namesake of our Chaco).  Then there was all the “not fun” stuff like

Our Chaco

Alli’s struggles with reading and her vision therapy that followed, Jill’s onset of MASSIVE anxiety that caused our family to nearly fall apart. I have posted a few times in the past years - Once in 2016 and 3 times in 2017 and honestly, I miss writing!  I miss sharing what is going on with us. It is like my digital journal.  So...I am gonna make an effort to post more than 3 times a year.  I hope you will join us if you want to come along for the ride!

Chaco - he gets cozy even in the worst conditions

If the last 3 years have taught us anything, it is that life is a roller coaster.  It has been so interesting to be able to look back on our blog to read about all these ups and downs.  In the past 3 years I have gone back and forth on keeping up on the blog. I cared and then I don’t care….round and round.  

But I always come back to the fact that LESSON 1: I LOVE TO WRITE!!    I love to share the lessons we learn on these trips and there is always someone out there who benefits from what I share.  I feel it is important to share a “real” life, the good and the bad, the amazing and the painfully hard.  I figure that if I share it on our blog then people who care can read about what is going on with us and people who could care less – can pass right on by…

So, with all of that being said, I want to write about our summer.  Read on or just scroll through the pictures….I love to write so I write for myself.  If my stories interests you, then thanks for reading!

As is true with everything in my life, the lessons start right away!!  Our first trip was 1 week to Santa Barbara with my parents and my sister’s family.  A tradition we have been doing for 5 – 6 years, a trip to southern California beaches. 

Lesson 2: Don’t take family for granted. There is something to be said for traditions shared with family and I think I have been taking that for granted during the last 2 years I have been trying to balance homeschooling my kids while working full time and being a wife, friend, daughter, sister, and thinking it is my job to make everyone happy.  Forget about trying to find a few moments of time for myself in there somewhere.  The blinders I had put on regarding how out of balance my priorities had become would start to come off during this first beach trip with my parents and my sister’s family.  

Kern River outside Kernville

I could feel it in the back of my mind, but I continually chose to block those messages out in favor of keeping up with the responsibilities I THOUGHT were so important. Those priorities that were so out of balance, they were nagging at me, but I just keep pushing them away.  And I was balancing so many plates that it was pretty easy to ignore obnoxious thoughts of figuring out a better balance in my life.  

It would become UNDENIABLE in July, and I would feel like I was drowning in a sea of all my past mistakes, but the lessons I would learn would be VITAL to changing my priorities.  I knew there was a reason I read FIERCE CONVERSATIONS TWICE in June and July.

Back to the traditional Beach getaway.  I have a few pictures from this trip.  One is the classic kids enjoying “hotel TV”.  They don’t realize that people have this same TV in their houses since we have never had a TV.  They fed the giraffes at the SB Zoo.  

Lesson 3: Gratitude for having 2 incomes. In the past I NEVER would have paid $6/each for the kids to feed 3 pieces of romaine lettuce to the giraffes, but we have a bit more discretionary income so I can justify the “extravagance” of this in exchange for the joy on their faces.  

The rest of the trip was all about food and beach time!  Santa Barbara is a great place to go for these two things.  I didn’t think it was possible to get sick of ice cream, but after McConnell’s the first night and then Pink Berry the next afternoon and McConnell’s AGAIN that night…I could not stomach any more ice cream!  However, New Earth carries their double peanut butter…it is worth the $8 a pint, although I really wish they would carry the espresso chip, it was AMAZING!!

Shane and I were still working (Inspire Charter School – YAY!!!!) so it was nice to be somewhere that we had signal and could still do our work even while sitting on the sandy shores of the Pacific or by the hotel pool or at the Santa Barbara Zoo!  The perks of having a job that can be done from a Smart Phone.

The next 2 weeks were in the Eastern Sierras. There are so many wonderful places to go in the Sierras that we can go there every summer for weeks and weeks on end and never run out of places to explore.  This year we spent a week in Onion Valley and a week in Palisades Glacier.  Onion Valley was a GREAT place to set up camp for a week because there was cell signal and the truck could still get Wi-Fi, this allowed us to be in the mountains, but keep up with work requirements. 

Lesson 4: Getting away from EVERYTHING in your life will ALWAYS bring clarity to those questions that are nagging at you!!  

Palisades Glacier was in July and so we were both on vacation!!  Out into the woods we went and without cell or Wi-Fi (our truck has Wi-Fi through AT&T), or any other responsibilities it was the first we were able to really just check out and enjoy each other and the kids and being away.  

My eyes started to open wider to the fact that I had WAY too many responsibilities and I had some fierce conversations with myself and Shane.  I promised that I would figure out some ways to balance these aspects of my life that felt out of whack.  Working at night and on the weekends, having a lot of time commitments outside of family time, always answering texts and phone calls, etc…. all these habits had to go….  But, where to start??  That is the hardest part, actually making REAL, MEANINGFUL and LASTING changes. 

Lesson 5: Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans….Mid-July brought us back to Chico, which is NEVER good! We miss the coolness of the Sierras (30- 40’s at night), the elevation of the mountains,  the joys of being away from everything that feels like a WANT TO and back into the world of heat, heat HEAT and HAVE TO’s.  We were home to participate in some classes and

My office in Onion Valley

workshops, but as life would have it, LIFE HAPPENED and we ended up taking a 180 degree turn. Sometimes life throws you those curve balls and you feel like you are under a wave with no clue as to which direction is up.  This was one of those times for me, and while it took me a little bit….I found the lessons and used it to improve my life. 

This is where I feel that I shine.  Instead of staying in a place of feeling beat down, hurt and disappointed in what was going on, I found the lessons in the situation – and the lessons were overflowing with gifts that I had been blind to just one month prior.  There was no denying that now my eyes were WIDE OPEN to the changes I needed to make. 

It wasn’t going to be easy, to change some DEEP, DEEP characteristics about myself, but I was willing to look at myself and make some changes that needed to be made. 

I work A LOT when I find something that means a lot to me!!!  I have always been this way. When I do something I do it at 200%. There is no 150% or 110% for me.  It is 200%, and I put my heart and soul into whatever it is I am doing, and I LOVE IT!  Yes, this is a downfall of mine. It benefits whoever I am doing things for, but it doesn’t benefit me or the most important people in my life.

This was the #1 reason that I resigned from teaching when I was pregnant with Alli.  I knew that I could not be a good teacher and a good mom.  I would EXCEL at one of them and SUCK at the other, so I gave up teaching to become a mom.  For 12 years I put 200% of myself into being a mom and wife, and never regretted that decision.  My kids and Shane were the center of my universe and that was perfect!! 

Then the opportunity of a lifetime presented itself.  I could work for a homeschool charter, get paid to share my 6 years of

Shane and Jill Backpacking in July

homeschooling knowledge with other homeschooling families and continue to homeschool our children.  I was told there would be 10 students, maybe 15!  That seemed totally doable for me.  Alli and Jill were 11 and 8 and I felt like I could balance these tasks better than I could have when the kids were younger, or when Jill was deep in her anxiety/sleep chaos - HELL.  Jill was still struggling with being away from me so this would allow me to work at her “enrichment classes,” so she could still participate in the classes she loved without causing major anxiety about her having to be away from me.  It was a WIN-WIN for all of us.

My 10 – 15 students grew to 20, then 25, then 40, then 45….and I LOVED IT!!  I loved my job. I loved the freedom I had and we had NEVER had 2 incomes so not having to count every penny was SO AMAZING!! 

I LOVED meeting with my families and helping

them navigate the sometimes choppy waters of homeschooling.  It felt like all those years of stress and crying and hard work I had put in to homeschooling our kids was actually serving a purpose.  I UNDERSTOOD what these families were going through and I could really help them!  And slowly, slowly….I was losing myself in my job.  There was no boundary between the two and so I just became my job.  But I loved it, so that was ok!

This is probably true for a lot of people who have a mostly virtual job.  You can’t go HOME, and check out of 
work because all of your work can be done on your Smart Phone which is always within arm’s reach.  

Where it used to be my children that were the only thing within arm’s reach at all times, now it was my laptop and my phone.  I was never “off” work.  But I LOVED my job so much that I made excuses for this.  I also had spent so many years being “just mom” that I am sure that some of this dedication to my job was because I finally felt important in a tangible way…not in a mom way (you know, in 10 years they will really appreciate me!)

Lesson 6: Lessons will continue to teach you when you are willing to continually learn.  The eye opening events that occurred for me in July had

Bear Lake in Utah - This place advertised "Most Famous Shakes"
We went next door to the place that advertised "Least Famous Shakes"

ripple effects that continued to teach me lessons during the trip we took in August.  This was not a planned trip, but it was one of the gifts that rose up from the lessons of July.  

It was so incredibly hot, then the Carr Fire in Redding along with numerous other fires, we just couldn’t take it (the heat, the smoke…) anymore.  We headed to Wyoming. 

We had already started back at work, so this was going to be a test of balancing work and travel.  Having WiFi in the truck really helps as this allows for me to work while Shane drives. Then, we find the GREATEST libraries to work in (shout out to Pinedale, Jackson Hole and Lander whose libraries were AMAZING! I wish Chico would put some money into our library!)  The kids can spend HOURS in libraries so we found that working on the road was super easy! 

This also tested a new boundary for me….no more working in the evenings!  I set this rule for myself when we were back in Chico.  I could answer emails for an hour in the evening OR I could sit on our porch swing with Shane and chat.  Those of you who remember the evenings when Jill just SCREAMED for hours every night (refer to 2015 – the year of HELL for our family!) will appreciate the fact that I am going to choose Shane over emails!! 

Let me tell you, I felt like a NEW PERSON!  I had found a way to turn off my working brain and just be ME!  It was so wonderful.  Those emails that come in at night are still gonna be there in the morning and I will answer them then.  What a GIFT it was for me to learn this.

Lesson 7 – Repeat Lesson 4: You really, really must GET AWAY from everything to clear out all the static in your head and find out what you really want - YOU, not other people!

Then we had our first weekend out in the Wind River Range.  SO BEAUTIFUL, and so out in the middle of nowhere that there was not cell service and the truck would not get WiFi.  We were completely unreachable and this is where the MAGIC happened.  Friday Evening to Monday Morning I was not there to answer emails, texts, facebook messages, etc….and guess what???  The world did not fall to pieces.  This was EARTH SHATTERING FOR ME!!!  

(Yes, I had 30 emails to answer, 15 FB messages, 20 FB notifications (from the Inspire group I monitor), 2 missed phone calls and 10 texts, but guess what….2 hours driving out to Lander and they were answered!  A new world just opened up to me that is for sure!  SIDE NOTE- My phone is now on SILENT at all times.  I cannot handle the constant dinging anymore. )

We had an amazing weekend.  CRAZY thunderstorms each day, Shane was hiking with Chaco for the largest one.  The same hike he spooked a Mama Moose and then the Moose trailed him just to be sure him and Chaco got VERY far away from baby!  At the same time, Jill and I had hiked along the south shore and found the sweetest little badger!  (You know badger are NOT nice, right?)  This one really liked us and just kept digging and walking around as we gave it enough space to feel safe. 

Later, when we had cell signal I looked up the spiritual meaning of these two animals that we ran into separately, but at the same time.  It made us smile and is right on, as the messages from nature are.

Lesson 8 and 9 from the animals:

Moose - Know and understand that you – and only you have the authority to make your own choices in life.
BADGER -   You must have faith in yourself and your abilities,  walk your path at your own pace.

From Green Rivers Lake we headed to Lander, Wyoming. This

place is serendipitous for us. Shane attended a conference there in May 2017  while he was still working for Oroville High.  He had already quit his job.  If you knew us back then, you remember that we had VERY LITTLE support when Shane quit his job.  Who gives up 13 years of tenured seniority in public school??? The high pay, the health insurance…for NOTHING!!  He just quit with no job in line, we were going to make it work on my income.   

People thought we were insane!   But we knew….that job was slowly killing him and money does not buy happiness.  We would go without so that he could get out of that awful job.  He spent his time in Lander planning on ways to maybe teach a class on the side to make a little money – or IDEALLY get a job with Inspire so we could work together.

Lesson 10: Quit a job that is killing you no matter WHAT people think!! So…here we were, one year later, back in Lander – Shane and I both employed full time with Inspire.   Shane quitting OHS was the BEST DECISION of our life!  Look at him – he GLOWS!!!

Shane went overnight in Lassen.  He hiked to the peak.

Lesson 11 – Never stop dreaming and believing that you can have everything that you want!!

We stayed for a few days with a family on my roster, so awesome, right?? (Selby honey production!!!  Best honey ever!!) The kids got to hang out with friends from back in Chico, we got to learn about

the ins and outs of honey making (FASCINATING!!) and hang out with some super cool people!!  Thanks, Chiaramontes!

From Lander we went to Yellowstone and met up with Shane’s parents.  We had a great time with them. 


Bruce drove while we looked for wildlife and walked the boardwalks of the Geyser Basins, and Mammoth Springs.  Believe me – I have NO DESIRE to hike in Bear, Moose, Wolf and Bison territory, they can have it all to themselves! 

                                                       Campfires (a treat…we

never have fires camping), GREAT FOOD, quality time with Grammy (you were so tolerable of the kids!!) .  Thanks Johnstons, we really appreciate these times that we get to spend together. 

We left Yellowstone on a Friday – Labor Day Weekend! We were able to go camping and be unreachable again….Palisades Creek in Idaho.  Family hike, 8 miles…that was a bit long, but it wasn’t an eastern sierra hike with crazy elevation gain so it was doable. Lazy days by some rivers and world famous SQUARE ice cream. 

We woke up today (Labor Day) and decided to drive home.  Yes, 13 hours – (15 hours with stopping) although we cross the time zone so at least we gain one hour back….but still that is a long drive.  We couldn’t stop in Winnemucca with only 6 hours of driving left.  We excel at this last day push home so we can sleep in our own beds! 

This summer really stretched my beliefs about many aspects of my life, but this is one of the lessons that I hold close to my heart.  No matter how long it took me to find a healthier balance in my life, my family didn’t hold it against me.  They just welcomed me back with open arms.  Thank you for the best lesson of all.

Lesson 12: I have the best family EVER.

Palisades Creek, Idaho. Kids playing Water Sprite Fairies...Still at 13 and 10 they have the best imaginations.